Mandi (with an "I")

Life has been my greatest art project—a wild mix of light and shadow, chaos and creation, pain and transformation. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: even the deepest scars can shine like stars when you own them unapologetically. 🌟

I didn’t exactly have a Disney-esque childhood (unless you count the villains running the show). Growing up in a dysfunctional family, love felt like something I had to earn, not something freely given. Depression became my too-familiar companion, wrapping me in a heavy fog. But even in my darkest moments, there was this tiny ember of defiance inside me, whispering: This isn’t how your story ends.

Therapy became my game-changer. Through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), I started to rewrite the scripts in my head—the ones that told me I wasn’t enough. But my healing wasn’t just about the mind—it was about reclaiming my soul.

Moving to San Francisco was like falling down the rabbit hole into my own Wonderland 🐇✨. For the first time, I felt free to be my quirky, curious, and fiercely authentic self. Wonderland became my personal metaphor—a place where I could embrace my contradictions and rewrite the rules of who I’m supposed to be.

Art has always been my magic wand. Writing, poetry, and collage art became my way of turning pain into something beautiful. My exhibition, Turn Your Scars into Stars, wasn’t just a creative project—it was a love letter to transformation. My poem Paintiful summed it up best: pain, when met with courage, becomes the foundation for beauty.

But let’s talk about Lilith for a moment. She’s my spiritual mama, the embodiment of boldness, fierceness, and defiance. 🔥 Lilith reminds me that I don’t have to shrink myself to make others comfortable. She’s the voice inside me that says, Demand your place, take up space, and don’t apologize for your fire. Sure, I can be “too hot to handle” sometimes, but only when I’m standing up for what I deserve. Lilith taught me that being bold isn’t a flaw—it’s my power.

On the flip side, Vincent van Gogh, my muse and my “Father,” keeps me grounded. His mantra, “What is done in love is done well,” is the heartbeat of everything I create. 🎨 His life was messy and chaotic, but his art reminds me that even in the storm, beauty can bloom.

Jungian philosophy ties it all together for me. Carl Jung’s teachings about the shadow and individuation showed me that healing isn’t about erasing your darkness—it’s about integrating it. 🌑✨ I’ve spent years sitting with my shadow, learning its language, and discovering the wisdom hidden in its depths.

As a Shadow Coach, I guide others through the same journey because I know firsthand how transformative it can be to embrace every part of yourself—the good, the messy, and the wild. My spiritual practices are the glue holding this colorful chaos together. Meditation, journaling, and energy work are my daily rituals, helping me stay grounded and connected to my truth. Nature is my sanctuary.

Whether I’m walking barefoot in the grass, meditating by the ocean, or simply getting lost in a forest, I feel deeply rooted in something bigger than myself. 🌊🌳 Nature, like the psyche, is full of hidden wonders and quiet lessons if you know where to look.

Of course, vulnerability isn’t always easy. Sharing my art and my story can feel like walking into a room full of people and saying, Here I am, flaws and all. But I’ve learned that the moments I’m most afraid to share are the ones that connect the deepest. Growth doesn’t happen in the comfort zone—it happens when you dare to show up, messy and magnificent.

My work as a mental health advocate in Thailand is one of my greatest passions. I’ve seen how stigma around self-love and narcissistic behavior can silence people, trapping them in shame. I want to change that narrative, even if it means speaking out when it’s uncomfortable (or downright risky). Cultural norms and political resistance may try to quiet me, but spoiler alert: they won’t. 🛑🚫

Looking ahead, I dream of building a sanctuary—a real-life Wonderland where art, healing, and spirituality collide. A place where people can confront their shadows, rediscover their magic, and feel unapologetically themselves. It’s a space I wish I’d had when I was lost in the dark—a home for the misfits, dreamers, and seekers to gather and grow.

At the heart of it all is love. ❤️ Love isn’t just a mushy feeling for me—it’s the engine that drives everything. Love pulled me out of the shadows, fuels my art, and inspires me to help others. It’s the thread that weaves together the broken pieces of my story, turning them into something beautiful.

My life isn’t a straight line—it’s a mosaic of contradictions stitched together with boldness, creativity, and a little bit of glitter. ✂️✨ Lilith gave me my fire, Vincent gave me my passion, and Jung showed me how to make peace with my shadows.

This is my journey: raw, real, and unapologetically me. Scars and all, I’m here, turning pain into art and fire into light. Every day, I add a little more magic to my story, a little more wonder to my Wonderland. 🌟

And that, my friend, is how I’m turning my scars into stars.

xx,

Mandi

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Listing here on Medium

Shadow Shines Star 🌟 For those who love delving into the depths of humanity and the labyrinth of psychology, this is your calling. Let’s explore the shadows and uncover the brilliance within. (Think Jung meets Van Gogh, but cooler.) 😉

Whisper from Vincent 🎨 Channeling straight from the man himself—yes, Vincent van Gogh! If you believe in spirits (and a little magic), this one’s for you. ✨ Grab your brushes and let’s paint what words can’t express! 💭🌻

Flame of Forever 🔥 A collection of twin flame fiction for those on the journey of connection, transformation, and a little cosmic chaos. If you feel it, you’ll feel it.

Poems & Random Thoughts 💭 Poetry, musings, and the occasional rant—because I write what I feel. Raw, real, and straight from the heart.

📱 Instagram Rundown

Personal: For those who want to get up close and personal (and maybe see my random obsession)💖

Official: Exactly what it sounds like—serious business, but with flair. 🖤

Collage Art: I’ll try to keep it updated (promise!). Expect plenty of cutting, tying, and tearing—and maybe a few pieces straight from my soul (and my eye). ✂️💧

Shadow Shines Star: Coming soon to illuminate your psyche! 🌟

Whisper from Vincent: Better read here (and don’t forget to subscribe); it's my creative collab with Him. 🌻💌

📝 Boring Resume Exactly what it says. Who needs it when you have passion, creativity, and a touch of shadow magic?

 🌒 Shadow Work Coaching Website (Coming Soon!) Get ready to dive deep into your shadows and discover the light within. Stay tuned for updates—your transformation awaits! 💫 Oh, and don’t forget to check out my Medium! 🖊️ It’s where I let my emotions run wild, turning feelings into words and words into art—a cozy little canvas for my heart. 🖼️